I love you, Maggi

Dear Maggi 2-minute noodles,

I love you. I don’t know what I’d do without you. I come home at odd times, tired of running around and sick of work. The nights are cold these days and I am glad to be indoors where it is warmer. As I drop the keys back in my bag, I see that there is no one around. Empty houses don’t feel like home, you know, and right now, I desperately want to feel at home. I am hungry too and simply want something steaming hot.

I drop my bag and stare dolefully around wondering if I'd have to go back outside for a cup of hot chocolate. Thankfully, I decide to raid the fridge and cupboards first. And there you are…the sight of your yellow wrapper brings a relieved sigh. A cup of water with that heavenly masala goes into the pan and boils away merrily while I break the noodles up. I drop the noodles in the water and wait for the magic.

As I wait, I think back on the countless nights before this when I have stood waiting for you. You are a part of many memories with friends, studies, late nights, books, rain and a growling tummy.  I love this smell - who invented that masala anyway?  That little pouch is what makes you tick, you know.  That, and the fact that no one can go wrong with you.

A few minutes and stirs later, you are ready. I tip you carefully on to a plate and leave the pan to soak in the sink. It is a break for a few minutes as I sit down with a story book that I enjoyed years ago. You are too hot to eat yet. I set you down and try to find an interesting chapter to read.

Right there – Perfection. A book in hand, a warm house smelling of cooking and you nearby.

SIGH….

With love,

Me

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Inspired by nature

Just to prove that my posts aren't all gloomy: A couple of poems inspired by nature. :)

Welcome, Distraction

Dragonflies in the afternoon light,
Gliding over fresh cut lawns;
Willing feet sink into sharp blades,
As I follow one and give up;
When wings shimmering, it darts away;
Escaping my playful fingers.
But another passes enticingly close,
Gleeful, I begin another dash;
Chasing dragonflies in the sun.

The Last Few

The sun is hidden
Behind light grey clouds
And the air is wet
After the rain
The last few drops fall
All the way down
Splashing into the puddle
A circle waves out
The next drop falls nearby
A smaller circle forms
And they clash
The old and the new
And it all looks so beautiful

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An Absurd Quest

There was a dream I was in,
Where I lost something of value.

I searched, but my dream ended,
Before I recovered my treasure.

Since then, every dream I’ve had,
Memory drives an irrational search.

The scene shifts, twists out of shape,
And it always ends as an endless quest.

All I know is, I lost it in a dream,
And now, my only hope lies in another. Read More......

Dear Visitor

Walk down my gallery,
And see all you want to;

Don’t ask me to explain,
My motive or meaning.

My art, though is true,
Isn’t meant for 'em all.

Knowledge only burdens,
The unprepared mind.

So, stop struggling to see,
What is just out of sight.

The meaning is such,
That it heeds no effort. Read More......

Daydreams...

I just finished a huge daydream spanning a few future years. It took me an hour to imagine it.

It was mainly about friendship. About dark, cold nights. Phone calls. Closure. Goodbyes and Hellos. Help. Clasped hands. A frantic chase. Hugs and tears. There was a letter too. And a confession. Cozy chats. Weak links. Sign language. Gatherings. And a face. Silence. Family and strangers. Happiness. Questions and answers. Cheerful voices. Apprehension. Many plans. All the right answers. Pleasant surprises. Perfection. Happiness.

Feelings have an odd way of spilling over from the imagination to reality. I don’t think they notice the difference. I don't think I do either. Read More......

Breaking Silent Nights...

I went to wash my face, tired of falling asleep over my notes. The tap was running and the lights felt harsh on the eyes. That was when it started. Someone was walking across the quadrangle outside, whistling. The notes were sharp and firm. He was excellent at it and I recognized the song ‘Teri adaaon pe marta hoon’ – from Barsaat. I remember watching Bobby Deol and Twinkle Khanna dance in that song - I think it was their debut film. Now, I just stood there smiling to myself and hummed along. Somehow I didn’t feel like finding out who it was. It felt like a moment to be enjoyed, uninterrupted by any questions. The night was silent except for him. He stopped after awhile. Somehow, sleep had vanished.

Some moments always tend to trigger memories. The last trip comes to mind - it was a CD straight out of college days. One after another all those old songs that we loved came up. We sang along, of course. Odd how I can perfectly recall every line of an old BSB song that I haven’t heard in years. The highlight was during the last length of return trip when the roads were emptying, and we felt particularly good after dinner. ‘So gaya ye jahaan’ from Tezaab came up – talk about timing! A smooth road, after the rains, cool breeze, open windows, a city going to sleep and we sang along. Twice. A perfect ending to a perfect trip.

I could go on and on as many of my fondest memories include music. I guess I have a thing for music and the night and silence and free voices – voices not trying to sound good, but just singing. Songs broken by giggles and abrupt changes in pitch. Songs we sing with a smile on our face, not caring how we sound and who hears us. Songs that just happen. Read More......

It.

Just one more time. What difference does it make? It isn’t really wrong, you know? I’m not breaking the law for god's sake! I am not addicted! I can stop anytime. I’m not out of control. I like this. I am choosing this. How can I be out of control when I am making a rational choice? Why are you being so dramatic about this? It doesn’t hurt anyone. It really doesn’t hurt me. It’s just fun and it feels good. It isn’t my imagination! You have no idea what you are talking about. I am stronger than the others. They can’t deal with it – I can. What do you know anyway? I am not going to end up like them. This is just for now – only for now. When better things happen, I will stop of course. How will better things happen? Things happen, don’t they? I’m just waiting here. What else can I do? The others? I don’t want to see the others. They are perfect, I am not. There, happy? That is what you wanted me to say, isn't it? Why can’t you see? I need this. I want this. This thing – this one thing. Think? About what? Why? Don't you understand? I don’t want to think. Thinking is hard - thoughts keep crowding in my head. I want a blank mind. I can't sleep with all that screaming in my head. This? It kills the voices. It brings that blessed silence.

It’s OK. Don’t worry about me. I’m fine. Really.


PS: It's FICTION, people. Please don't get worried! Read More......

Voice from an empty nest

One from the past again.
--------

You are home after so long. I see you. Touch you. Listen to you. I’m just trying to assess the damage the world has inflicted. I want to know if you are ok. If you will be ok. My glance keeps coming back to your hands. They’ll tell me the truth. Despite your brave, kind lies.

Your hands, once so soft are now beginning to show changes. I notice the almost-healed cut on the thumb – what happened? You were cutting up vegetables for dinner? A splash of hot oil has left a burn mark on your wrist. You palms show the strain of having to pump water from the hand pump. The whiteness of the skin hidden by your watch strap is in sharp contrast to the rest of your hand. It speaks of hours of travel in the hot sun. The very lines on your palm seem to have changed directions. But, I also notice that your grasp, which used be that of a child holding on for guidance, is now changed. I feel the grasp of an adult and an equal. You are growing stronger. You stand tall and speak with confidence and conviction.

I’m still scared for you, of course. I can never be sure that you have all that you need. I will fret and worry. Never mind me. I’m just wondering if I did everything I should and could for you. There is no way of absolutely knowing that. I know that. And yet, I do wonder and hope. Read More......

Change

Everything changes. Everything. That is it.

You are walking constantly and so are the others. For a while, you fall in pace with someone. And there is company - laughter and conversation. Then comes a ditch that you cross in a leap and the other chooses to circumvent. You are over the pit instantly and have to keep walking. You can’t wait. You have to keep going. You try walking in circles feeling a bit clever. But somehow, the land is moving too. Nothing ever falls in place in exactly the same way. You try and try and only go dizzy. You take a last look at the familiar face and stop trying.

Sooner or later, you learn that you cannot re create moments or feelings. A memory is just that. A memory. It is a past record. Not a promised future. You stop trying to hold on to what was and go on to create more memories. Such a lot of effort. But there really is no other way. The odd thing is, it isn’t a lesson that stays with you to prevent future mistakes. It happens over and over again. You don’t learn from this mistake. Read More......

The Big Read list - how many you have?

Picked this tag from this blog.

The Big Read reckons that the average adult has only read 6 of the top 100 books they've printed.

* Look at the list and bold those you have read.
* Italicize those you intend to read.
* Mark in RED the books you LOVE.
* Reprint this list in your own blog.
* Having seen the movie/cartoon/TV series is not the same as having read the book.
* Reading abridged versions also does not count. :)


The List

1. The Lord of the Rings, JRR Tolkien
2. Pride and Prejudice, Jane Austen
3. His Dark Materials, Philip Pullman
4. The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy, Douglas Adams
5. Harry Potter and the Goblet of Fire, JK Rowling
6. To Kill a Mockingbird, Harper Lee
7. Winnie the Pooh, AA Milne
8. Nineteen Eighty-Four, George Orwell
9. The Lion, the Witch and the Wardrobe, CS Lewis
10. Jane Eyre, Charlotte Brontë
11. Catch-22, Joseph Heller
12. Wuthering Heights, Emily Brontë
13. Birdsong, Sebastian Faulks
14. Rebecca, Daphne du Maurier
15. The Catcher in the Rye, JD Salinger
16. The Wind in the Willows, Kenneth Grahame
17. Great Expectations, Charles Dickens
18. Little Women, Louisa May Alcott
19. Captain Corelli's Mandolin, Louis de Bernieres
20. War and Peace, Leo Tolstoy
21. Gone with the Wind, Margaret Mitchell
22. Harry Potter And The Philosopher's Stone, JK Rowling
23. Harry Potter And The Chamber Of Secrets, JK Rowling
24. Harry Potter And The Prisoner Of Azkaban, JK Rowling
25. The Hobbit, JRR Tolkien
26. Tess Of The D'Urbervilles, Thomas Hardy
27. Middlemarch, George Eliot
28. Prayer For Owen Meany, John Irving
29. The Grapes Of Wrath, John Steinbeck
30. Alice's Adventures In Wonderland, Lewis Carroll
31. The Story Of Tracy Beaker, Jacqueline Wilson
32. One Hundred Years Of Solitude, Gabriel García Márquez
33. The Pillars Of The Earth, Ken Follett
34. David Copperfield, Charles Dickens
35. Charlie And The Chocolate Factory, Roald Dahl
36. Treasure Island, Robert Louis Stevenson
37. Town Like Alice, Nevil Shute
38. Persuasion, Jane Austen
39. Dune, Frank Herbert
40. Emma, Jane Austen
41. Anne Of Green Gables, LM Montgomery
42. Watership Down, Richard Adams
43. The Great Gatsby, F Scott Fitzgerald
44. The Count Of Monte Cristo, Alexandre Dumas
45. Brideshead Revisited, Evelyn Waugh
46. Animal Farm, George Orwell
47. Christmas Carol, Charles Dickens
48. Far From The Madding Crowd, Thomas Hardy
49. Goodnight Mister Tom, Michelle Magorian
50. The Shell Seekers, Rosamunde Pilcher
51. The Secret Garden, Frances Hodgson Burnett
52. Of Mice And Men, John Steinbeck
53. The Stand, Stephen King
54. Anna Karenina, Leo Tolstoy
55. Suitable Boy, Vikram Seth
56. The BFG, Roald Dahl
57. Swallows And Amazons, Arthur Ransome
58. Black Beauty, Anna Sewell
59. Artemis Fowl, Eoin Colfer
60. Crime And Punishment, Fyodor Dostoyevsky
61. Noughts And Crosses, Malorie Blackman
62. Memoirs Of A Geisha, Arthur Golden
63. Tale Of Two Cities, Charles Dickens
64. The Thorn Birds, Colleen McCollough
65. Mort, Terry Pratchett
66. The Magic Faraway Tree, Enid Blyton
67. The Magus, John Fowles
68. Good Omens, Terry Pratchett and Neil Gaiman
69. Guards! Guards!, Terry Pratchett
70. Lord Of The Flies, William Golding
71. Perfume, Patrick Süskind
72. The Ragged Trousered Philanthropists, Robert Tressell
73. Night Watch, Terry Pratchett
74. Matilda, Roald Dahl
75. Bridget Jones's Diary, Helen Fielding
76. The Secret History, Donna Tartt
77. The Woman In White, Wilkie Collins
78. Ulysses, James Joyce
79. Bleak House, Charles Dickens
80. Double Act, Jacqueline Wilson
81. The Twits, Roald Dahl
82. Capture The Castle, Dodie Smith
83. Holes, Louis Sachar
84. Gormenghast, Mervyn Peake
85. The God Of Small Things, Arundhati Roy
86. Vicky Angel, Jacqueline Wilson
87. Brave New World, Aldous Huxley
88. Cold Comfort Farm, Stella Gibbons
89. Magician, Raymond E Feist
90. On The Road, Jack Kerouac
91. The Godfather, Mario Puzo
92. The Clan Of The Cave Bear, Jean M Auel
93. The Colour Of Magic, Terry Pratchett
94. The Alchemist, Paulo Coelho
95. Katherine, Anya Seton
96. Kane And Abel, Jeffrey Archer
97. Love In The Time Of Cholera, Gabriel García Márquez
98. Girls In Love, Jacqueline Wilson
99. The Princess Diaries, Meg Cabot
100. Midnight's Children, Salman Rushdie

I tag everyone reading this :) This is fun! Read More......